Chapter 1

"Miss Smith, our records show that you are unmarried."

The clerk turned the screen toward me. "The spouse field on Mr. Carter Gordon's profile is registered to another woman."

I stared at the familiar name on the screen. Mandy Lynn, the secretary he had kept close for two years.

Everyone said Carter Gordon loved me to his core.

But it turned out the woman he called his "wife" was someone else entirely.

And I had spent five years as the punchline of a joke I never knew was being told.

I dialed a number. "Help me erase my identity. The sooner, the better."

Since he had given someone else the title, there was no reason for Tara to exist anymore.

Tara's POV

In the fifth year of my relationship with Carter Gordon, my visa hit a snag.

Several international preschools in New York were organizing a joint six-month exchange program in Canada next month. As the lead teacher on the trip, I had taken a half day off to visit the immigration office and update my documentation.

The clerk tapped at her keyboard, frowning slightly, checking the information on her screen several times before finally looking up at me. "Miss Tara Smith, your marital status doesn't match what you filled in. The system shows you as currently unmarried."

I blinked, then gave a gentle smile. "Could there be a mistake? My husband and I registered here in New York three years ago. We even paid for expedited processing."

The clerk turned the screen toward me and pointed to a line of text. "Our system syncs in real time. It doesn't make errors. You are registered as unmarried. However, the spouse field on Mr. Gordon's profile is registered to another woman."

A name was printed clearly on the screen: Mandy Lynn.

A sharp ringing filled my ears. The sounds around me fell away, leaving nothing but a high-pitched hum.

Mandy Lynn. I knew that name far too well.

During the two years I had been in San Francisco completing my early childhood education certification, she had been the secretary Gordon kept at his side. His explanation at the time was that the pressure of work had grown too heavy. He needed a capable assistant to handle the smaller things. That was all.

I have no memory of walking out of the immigration office.

The early autumn air hit me like a wall of cold. I clutched the rejected paperwork in both hands and sank numbly into the driver's seat of my car.

My phone screen lit up. A message from Gordon popped onto the display.

"Sweetie, it's getting cold in New York today. Make sure you bundle up. I pushed back the afternoon conference call and went to stand in line at that bakery you love. I picked up the chestnut cake. Come home early tonight, okay? I want to spend the evening with you."

I stared at those words until my eyes burned. Not a single tear came.

Five years. Gordon's devotion to me was known all across New York.

Once, I said offhand that I loved the ocean. He bought a private island off the coast of Los Angeles and built a lighthouse on it, naming it after me.

When I mentioned feeling sorry for the preschool children having to play outside in the cold, he wrote a check for a fully climate-controlled indoor children's center, built right in the heart of the city where land costs a fortune.

I was afraid of the dark, so every night he turned down every invitation and every dinner, staying in to hold my hand and talk me to sleep.

Everyone said Gordon loved me down to the bone.

But it turned out, buried inside that love was a lie this big.

I pulled in a slow breath, forced down the nausea rising in my stomach, and drove back to the house.

I pushed open the front door and heard voices in the living room. Gordon and his friend Oliver were talking.

"You skipped out of the office again to go buy cake?" Oliver teased. Something envious hid beneath the humor. "Mandy, your whole devoted-husband thing never lets up, does it?"

Gordon stretched out on the sofa, legs crossed, voice lazy with amusement. "She deserves to be spoiled. She should always feel like the most treasured person in the world."

"Fair enough." Oliver dropped the teasing and lowered his voice. "But what are you doing about Mandy? If Tara ever finds out, you know her. She'll walk."

I stood in the shadow of the doorway and stopped breathing. Every drop of blood in my body seemed to freeze.

Gordon turned his lighter over in his fingers. The faint metallic click filled the silence. His voice was perfectly casual. "She's not going to find out."

"But what if she does?"

"Mandy and I have been together two years. She has severe depression. She can't function without me." Gordon's tone was calm in a way that was frightening. "Marrying her is the only security I can give her."

"Tara has all of my love. She has the status, the respect, everything that comes with being with me. Mandy has to stay hidden. I use the marriage to keep her stable. It's not a big deal."

Oliver let out a long breath. "What you're doing is dangerous. Who do you actually love?"

"Tara, obviously." No hesitation. "But Mandy... I can't let go of her either."

I pressed my back against the cold wall. The pain was so sharp it reached into my lungs.

He had never wanted to choose. He wanted both.

He had used me as the window display, the proof of how deeply he could love, while keeping Mandy tucked away inside his real life.

I turned and left the house without making a sound.

I didn't storm inside. I didn't scream or cry or demand answers. The pain was so absolute it had turned my mind perfectly clear.

If he was so certain I would never find out, then I would make sure he could never find me again.

I took out my phone and dialed an encrypted number. "I need to erase my identity. As quickly as possible."